In terms of money the best lesson my parents gave me was that when you have a little or when you have a lot or any amount in between you must respect that amount and take care in budgeting your finances. Every month my parents sat down at the kitchen table and wrote a budget. We were not made to sit there and take part, but if we did sit with them we were to listen carefully and learn from the experience.

My parents had very little money until I was about the age of 12 and then my dad’s work allowed him to gradually have a lot. By the time I was in my early 20’s my father had a six figure salary and he worked hard earning every penny. They are now retired and due to not being able to save for so many years they live on a tight, but manageable budget. They still sit down every month and create a budget. My mom still worries if they will have enough and my dad still assures her they will survive. They still plan and spend wisely, and it is by their example that I learned how to appreciate and respect money. Funny, appreciation and respect are also important in sex.

By comparison, I grew up in a much better financial environment but I was reminded often, through words and examples, about being careful with money. Through constant osmosis, it must have seeped in to my consciousness because I can only remember being a saver.

But, there were never any direct, informative discussions about money. I don’t think it was taboo, it was more a case of lack of insight as to how important fiscal prudence is. When you have little discretionary income, your options are more limited.

Unfortunately, my dad will probably never be mortgage free even though he’s been careful with his money all of his life. My mom was left with debt when her 2nd husband died and didn’t let her know that he let his life insurance lapse.

My parents split up when I was 12 and my sister 8 and we grew up with very different perspectives on money management. Perhaps there were innate differences or perhaps it was partly due to my mom’s second husband believing he needed to project a successful image through material displays of consumption.

Instead of asking for help from ‘well off’ family members he tapped his savings well completely dry for a 30% downpayment. As a contractor he had difficulty getting a mortgage but he found a way.

I started up my own business a few years later and have experienced a taste of success so far —- I know what it feels like to build a business from the ground up with my own two hands —- it feels great and fills me with the same pride my dad must have felt years earlier.

Things changed after I became a home owner, the monthly mortgage payments increased (compared to rent) and I started planning things and the GIC hit forced me to re-think about investing and I studied on risk. I have only started investing in stock since last May (from the peak) at the age of 34, and am still learning. Now, I have a nice RRSP portfolio (after the last year of ups and downs, my portfolio is only down -5% compared to S&P that’s down by over 30%. I also have an emergency account now. I don’t have any GICs. Whenever my parents visit me next time, I am going to teach them a few things about risk and investing (if they want to learn) – they are 65 now, and retired with almost zero savings, but are mortgage free and own just 1 house.

ctreit: Great point about couples often having sexual intimacy WELL before they have financial intimacy .. or even basic conversation about money!

As for finance, it was not lost on my parents that I had a habit of hoarding my allowance money and so we opened a bank account. As I grew up we decided on allowance amounts which eventually became quarterly cheques. The idea was that I’d take the money, spend it on what I need/want to, and would not ask them for case-by-case help.

I remember one incident in elementary school where I missed the bus and took a taxi, but realized I did not have the cash. I asked the taxi to stop at a convenience store where I used an ATM to take out a $20. My parents told this story for years and even wrote it into the Toronto Star at one point.

No problem with the sex part as throughout my teen years – I was shy of the opposite sex – and was no longer a virgin til I went into college.

Finance – my parents didn’t talk to me about money – but I somehow knew/felt that money was an issue for them because I remember at the beginning of getting an allowance – my parents gave me it without me asking for it weekly – but as I got older – I had to ask for it and I sensed that they were having financial difficulty as for some reason they weren’t happy in giving me an allowance (that’s how I felt).

So – I guess with my background – I’m financially conservative with my money – and I do worry about it even though I have a stable job and don’t have to try too hard to keep my savings up to pay for expenses and having an emergency fund.

Also, the internet has been a great resource for me in understanding finance and other stuff in our world.

I even ask those people who I have some form of close relationship with how much they make on occasion. I know roughly how much my dad makes (very volatile because he is commission based), how much my sister makes, my mom, 3 of my closer friends, my 2 sisters in law, my father in law, my aunt … I think that’s about it.

I wonder what they really think of me because of all that if talking about money is truly still as taboo as you say it is.

I also realized about three years ago that my parents actually know nothing about personal finance, and that’s when I took it upon myself to learn. I was investing in my first GIC and asked my dad to explain the details. He had NO idea. Now i’m trying to teach my older sister about the basics, since she never learned either.

Regarding money, I have learned a lot from my parents but in a different way:
My parents went bankrupt 13 years ago because they were spending like a teenager who just received his first Mcdo paycheck! However, I have learned:
#1 you can spend as much money as you want but it won’t bring you happiness

#2 if you don’t have a plan B and you lose your job, the plan B will become the plan Bankdrupt

#3 you don’t have to work hard to make money, you have to work smart (13 years after, they are living on a acreage property with a small lake, having a brand new truck, a Harley Davidson for summer and they work 3 days a week….and they are debt free!)

I think I’ll revisit this topic on my blog too… thx for the idea MDJ!